I have been asked the weirdest things during the past 2 years while changing from being super unhealthy to being relatively fit and healthy.
Q. Why does your food stink?
A. My food smells like fresh vegetables, why does your take aways smell like rotten oil?
Q. You don’t look the same as your ID picture, are you sick? Have you seen a doctor?
A. No, that’s an old photo and I have lost weight since.
Q. Was the weight loss planned? Are you sick? Are you ok?
A. Yeah it was planned, but more importantly, were you planned?
Q. Are you ever going to be fun again?
A. This is my fun now, if you don’t like it, f*ck off.
Q. I am sure you can have one drink? You can drink whiskey, that is healthy?
A. Yes, I can do what I want, but I don’t want to have one shot. I want to have coffee.
Q. You’ve changed so much, do you go to church now?
Q. Surely you can’t diet forever?
A. Surely you can’t be that stupid?
Q. OMG you were huge, how did I not notice?
A. How did I not notice that you were a douche, oh wait I did, but I decided to keep my mouth shut.
Q. Why do you still gym and run so much if you have reached your goal weight?
A. It’s called being fit, you should try it some day!
As you can see, I love answering questions with questions |
People, when you are trying to lose weight, you not only have to be quick to say no to shit, but you also need to be quick at thinking up sarcastic answers.
Compliments are great, but when do compliments become stupid questions?
Post Update | This Just in:
Q. Hey Mandy, now that your foot is messed up and you can’t run you better not get fat again!
A. Yeah, don’t worry about me, I have cut my calories while not exercising, better be careful, I may cut you whilst i’m cutting shit!